Sisterhood

Last week my big sister celebrated a milestone birthday...40

...and it is very hard to believe. Well, it is hard to believe because that means I am only two years behind. Yikes!

But, that is not what I wanted to write about...I want to write about my beautiful sister! You see as the younger sister I have always lived somewhat in her shadow. I have always wanted to be so much like her, always trying with not much success!

You see, no matter how hard I have tried I have always fallen, well, short. My sister is tall and growing up she had the most beautiful almost always perfect blond hair...me well I am short comparatively speaking and my crazy brown hair has always had a mind of its own.

But even further back I tried to be like her. All through school my teachers were excited when they found out I was Chris' little sister...that was until they found out I was nothing like her. She was smart and a wonderful student, I was more creative and a trouble maker of sorts.

I always wanted to be everywhere she was and do everything that she did. And like the typical big sister she wanted to be anywhere I wasn't and do anything without me! It took a while to stop living in her shadow, to realize that I was my own unique person, created and gifted just the way I am supposed to be! It really wasn't until we were both in High School when we had become friends that this realization took place.

And know my sister is my best friend... I can't imagine life without her! We have shared many hours filled with both laughter and tears. We have had our share of fights as well as times that we stuck together like glue. She is currently miles away...across the pond...and I miss her dearly. But, no matter how far away she is she is always close in my heart. I look forward to the moments we are able to share on the phone...and cherish the times we get to spend together in person!

I think I still live in her shadow...but that is one of my favorite places to be! It is there that I feel my best. It is there that I am close enough to hear people say, You must be Chris' little sister! Gladly I respond with a big smile across my face, You Bet! Isn't she the best!

All my love Sister! Here is to growing old!

Excuse me...do I Smell?

At church on Sunday I was given a Composition Book and the opportunity to journal as an exercise for Lent. I was a little hesitant because I am not really a journal kinda a girl, but thought it could be the "addition" to my Lenten journey. (I always add something for Lent, because I never really had success in giving up something in the past. And since I have started this practice a number of years ago, I have had much more success and a deeper more meaningful Lent.)

So, I sat Sunday morning with my journal and pen and just began to write...free form, random thoughts flowed onto the page. And I began to write:

Be near. Draw me close.

In that moment of silence an image formed in my mind. I saw God's arms pulling me in to embrace me, I felt those arms holding me tightly, my head resting on his chest. And as I sat there enveloped in the arms of God I took in a deep breath and another phrase flowed onto the page:

May your aroma linger. May I smell of you.

As I sat there, still in the quiet moment I thought about aroma... the smell of chlorine and how when you have been swimming the smell of chlorine stays on your skin, clings to you for awhile and people can smell that you have been swimming. I also thought of my dad on Date Night; how he smelled so good and the scent lingered in the air even after he had left the room. I also thought about how sometimes people have a certain smell and when you are embraced by them their smell lingers on you...

That was what I longed for in that moment:

To smell like God, to know without a doubt I had been embraced in the arms of God, for that scent to linger a while longer!

So now I ask the question...

excuse me do I smell?